How do I stay in a relationship with a person that might be

chas188's picture
(8135)

How do I stay in a relationship with a person that might be a pathological liar not realize they lie or do it as a defense. Going beyond my wife's affair which she still dribbles truth years later but in marriage therapy she actually lied straight out lied about an exchange we had. A conversation I even took ownership over having feelings about. It led to a heated 3 minute ending with me feeling if she's lying still about stuff not related to affair how do I stay? How do I try to work with that if she's not aware or refuses. The day after like nothing happened this is what makes me feel disconnected. Im trying so hard you guys think she is but not sure if its all she has or for appearances she says the right things but not sure actions match

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(130)
May 15

@John99 totally agree. My ex was just like that. When he accused my daughter and I of things we would just look at each other confused. Just things so twisted that made us look horrible.Things like we used him for money and dont care about him ..like we were money hungery and selfish (totally opposite of who i am and who i raised my daughter to be) I just thought how could you possibly feel that way? It made no sense. I was litterally hands to feet for him and did everything i cld to save money including downsizing.
It made sense after I found out he had a three year affair. It was like he needed reasons to why we werent good enough. Why it was ok for him to cheat.

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CKBlossom's picture
(532375)
May 16

@Hixyz I can actually agree with that. :)

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CKBlossom's picture
(532375)
May 16

@Noworries My father did similar things, like he was trying to make us seem bad to take away his guilt or make it easier for him to justify his affair.

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